Why might empathy be perhaps the most important quality of our time?
In a world characterized by profound changes, stability and orientation are essential. Values and characteristics that should actually be taken for granted play a central role in this. Empathy is one of them.
The ability to empathize with other people should be something everyone should strive for. But instead of Understanding and Compassion we all too often encounter comfort and selfishness. In this article, you can find out why empathy is perhaps the most important quality of our time and how you can become (even) more empathetic.
"Participation is the golden key that opens the hearts of others."
Samuel Smiles
Empathy means, Assume responsibility and to respond to the feelings of other people. Those who are empathic can see the world through the eyes of another person and feel sympathy and compassion. This ability is an essential component emotional intelligence.
Responsible for this are our Mirror neurons. They help us to interpret actions and emotions - but only if we are also aware of our own feelings. Because it is only through self-awareness that true compassion arises.
Empathy is the basis for every interpersonal relationship - be it in the family, at work or in society. It also plays a decisive role in politics and business. Social interaction cannot work without empathy.
The psychologist Paul Bloom takes a critical view of this. In his book Against Empathy he argues that empathy is often selective and irrational. According to him, it can even lead to wrong decisions.
What are the characteristics of a high level of empathy? What factors can people with high empathy use to determine how the other person feels? Basically, there are 4 pillars according to which empathic people evaluate the condition of their counterpart.
People with a high level of empathy can use the Body language (e.g. bent over), voice (e.g. shaky) or choice of words (e.g. negative) indicate the condition of the other person.
In addition, empathic people try to shed more light on the motives for the emotional state of the other person.
In addition, the counterpart should finally get a feeling of Acceptance so that they can regain their emotional composure in bad times.
Furthermore, the empathic person thinks strongly about how the respective interlocutor will behave in the future based on his emotional state.
In psychology, a distinction is made between three types of empathy: emotional, cognitive and social empathy. How exactly these three forms differ, I would like to tell you in the following.
Emotional empathy
Emotional empathy refers to "feeling with" and "reacting" to the emotional state of the other person. In doing so, the feelings of the counterpart are often transferred to one's own mood. Emotional empathy is especially important for interpersonal relationships.
Cognitive empathy
Cognitive empathy helps us to understand the feelings of our counterpart. Those who have a strong cognitive empathy can perceive nonverbal and paraverbal expressions well and deduce the emotional state of the other person on the basis of these.
Social empathy
Social empathy helps us relate to different character types. People who have a high level of social empathy get along with different personality types pretty good.
The philosopher Thiemo Breyer emphasizes that empathy is not only a positive quality, but can also facilitate instrumentalization and manipulation.
We encounter empathy every day:
Just imagine if the colleagues had behaved a little more tolerantly. Perhaps they would have motivated their colleague in such a way that she would have been at her best after all. Or they would have behaved a little more empathetically toward their partner. Wouldn't that make everyone involved feel better?
Just imagine if the colleagues had behaved a little more tolerantly. Perhaps they would have motivated their colleague in such a way that she would have been at her best after all. Or they would have behaved a little more empathetically toward their partner. Wouldn't that make everyone involved feel better?
Many of us are quick to prejudge. But surely it would relax one or the other situation if we change our perspective every now and then. To slip into the skin of the other person... Because most of the time there are completely different motives behind it. Of course, it takes courage from time to time: But just talk to the person who is not treating you right. Just describe to her what that does to you, what that triggers in you. And then wait with anticipation for their response!
Empathy has advantages but also disadvantages for people. In the following, we would therefore like to give you ten advantages and ten disadvantages on the topic of empathy, and at the same time discuss corresponding examples.
Answer the following questions honestly - this will give you a good feeling for where you are already strong and where you can perhaps develop further.
The more of these questions you answer with "Yes" the more pronounced your empathic skills are. You seem to be good at putting yourself in other people's shoes, recognizing their feelings and responding appropriately. This not only helps you in personal relationships, but also in a professional environment, as empathy is often the key to successful and respectful communication.
If you answer some questions with "No" there's no need to worry - empathy can be trained. You may sometimes find it difficult to recognize unspoken emotions or to empathize with perspectives that differ from your own. Use this realization as an opportunity to work specifically on these points.
No matter what your result looks like: The first step towards more empathy is always to consciously look, listen and remain open to the feelings of others.
Empathy can be learned! In order for you to succeed, we would like to share 7 tips with you in the following, with which you can learn to train your empathy, so that you can better respond to your fellow human beings in private and professional everyday life.
How often do the words of the person you're talking to go in one ear and out the other? It probably happens now and then. That's why you should concentrate on the person you're talking to. This way you learn to read the lines in between and that helps you to understand your counterpart better.
As you have already learned in this article, based on the Body language The emotional state of the other person can be interpreted. And that's why it's especially important that you pay attention to the body language of your counterpart in the conversation. Gestures, facial expressions and posture are particularly important here.
A conversation is not a one-way street. That's why it's important that you ask questions that get the other person to open up. It is also important that your interest is genuine and not fake. Your counterpart would notice the latter on a subconscious level. And of course, that would not be an advantage for your relationship.
As soon as the other person starts to open up, it is important that you respond to his feelings and offer him comfort. He is likely to open his heart to you and share thoughts and feelings that make him vulnerable. Your task is therefore to make your counterpart feel safe so that he feels comfortable around you.
It does not happen overnight that a person opens up to you fully. It takes time and trust. You create trust by giving a person your time. And therefore: If you want a person to open up to you, then also bring enough time so that the necessary basis of trust can develop.
Prejudices often contribute to the fact that we close ourselves off and thus leave no room for a free interaction with our counterpart. For this reason, it is extremely important that we throw our prejudices overboard. Because only in this way can we face our counterpart without bias and only then do we succeed in getting to know them better.
We usually surround ourselves exclusively with people who are like us. That's a shame, because in this way we limit our own horizons. And therefore the final tip: Surround yourself with different people. You're guaranteed to learn a lot from them and thus also be able to develop a new level of empathy.
Ecpathy refers to consciously separating oneself from the feelings of others. In certain situations, such as when dealing with toxic people, this detachment can be an advantage.
What does it mean to be ecpathetic?
Being ecpathetic means not getting emotionally involved with the other person. To a certain extent, this can be helpful as it prevents the other person's negative feelings from spreading to you. A certain emotional distance protects against emotional stress in such cases.
The danger of exaggeration
However, too much emotional distance also harbors risks, especially in close relationships. It is crucial to find a balance between compassion and healthy detachment so as not to jeopardize important interpersonal connections.
Finding the balance
There is a risk of becoming emotionally closed off and losing access to other people through too much ecpathy. It is therefore important to differentiate between different situations: While ecpathic behavior can be useful in the workplace as a protective mechanism against toxic colleagues, it can lead to alienation in the private sphere. Family, friends or your partner may feel distanced as a result of this detachment, which puts a strain on the relationship.
Would you like to find out how empathetic you really are? Take our Personality Test and learn more about your ability to empathize and set boundaries. Find out how you can deal better with your own feelings and those of others in different situations!
Empathy alone does not move mountains. But it is the first important step towards tolerant, colorful coexistence. The good news is that there are various studies. According to them, none of the past generations has been as tolerant and as committed to equality as today's generation.
Everyone can start by sharpening their own perception and actively empathizing with others. Perhaps this will give rise to a movement that changes more than we can imagine today.
Because compassion is a raw material that the world needs more urgently than oil, coal and silicon put together. 💙
Would you like to find out how empathetic you really are?
