Around a tenth of Germans are said to be emotionally cold. What about you, do you get emotional quickly or do you always stay cool? What does cold-heartedness actually mean? In professional life, it sometimes seems to make sense. But in other situations, you suffer from it. Here you will find useful information on the subject to help you.
The Definition of emotional coldnessEmotional blindness or alexithymia refers to the inability to feel emotions. This personality trait is compounded by the problem of dealing with other people's feelings. Those who are emotionally cold do not want to talk about it and feel inadequate, unimaginative and purely functional. Those affected brush aside any psychosomatic complaints. They feel a inner emptiness and can't get excited about anything.
How do you feel about this statement, do you feel addressed? Maybe there's more hidden behind your cool facade than you think.
Do you recognize your own feelings or are you avoiding them? Coaching will teach you a lot about yourself. This will also help you get to the root of your emotional coldness. But if your emotional life is disturbed, you have problems with your emotional perception.
Cold feelings weaken your emotional intelligence and make it difficult for you to analyze your inner life. This also has a negative effect on your social life.
However, emotional blindness often doesn't mean that you are really numb: you just can't express your emotions. You notice this especially in moments when other people are happy. Or when you feel very queasy on sad occasions because you can't empathize.
It is precisely these moments that make you think about your supposed emotional coldness.
What do you do with your feelings when they surprise you? When you are numb, you see yourself distanced from your own emotions.
Emotional coldness often manifests itself in low emotional intelligence. Exaggeratedly cool reactions and a lack of empathy are typical symptoms. But are you really as emotionally cold as you pretend to be? Perhaps you deal with your feelings in a completely different way behind the façade and are able to empathize with the emotions of the other person. Not everyone who seems cold is actually cold: however, many people hold back their emotional reactions. This doesn't necessarily make it easier to understand the emotional world of others.
You may feel particularly challenged in some situations when it comes to emotionality. You hardly recognize the difference between mental and physical sensations. You have difficulty assessing other people and lack imagination and empathy.
Mindfulness and emotionality are closely linked. In the mindful By dealing with your emotions, you get to know yourself better. You build a stronger connection to your emotional world, without judgment and with great Acceptance.
Perhaps you have already had experience with mindfulness-based methods. Meditative exercises and other techniques strengthen your self-awareness. You will recognize your body's warning signals and learn to control your emotions.
Emotional coldness can be caused by certain life events or experiences. Common causes are
The lack of emotions can be the result of an emotionally cold mother: the deficit is passed on from one generation to the next.
If emotional coldness serves the purpose of self-protection, it is not a conscious barrier. The problem is that the repressed emotions are an interpersonal barrier. Relationship almost impossible.
Disappointments in the past naturally influence your emotional life and also your emotional forms of expression. But if you only ever repress things, you can't develop and will remain numb in the long term.
People who are emotionally cold do not like to talk about their inner life. Yet emotional communication is essential for interpersonal relationships.
At the Communication with emotionally cold people empathy plays a major role. Attention is required here. In the best case scenario, empathetic people respond specifically to the person they are talking to. Perhaps you fear that the person you are talking to is cold - this is precisely when you should sharpen your perception.
In a partner relationship, the ratio of coolness and emotionality is rarely balanced. Of course, the partners influence each other. The longer they are together, the more difficult it is for them to recognize the emotional coldness as such. That's why it's important to talk about your emotions. Be patient and understanding - this increases your chances of rekindling love.
With the following Test questions you will find out how you feel about your own emotions:
Your dealings with Emotions are usually cool and that's what You're actually quite relaxed. Is that really the case, or does it make you feel uncomfortable? Maybe you're not cold at all, but just introvertand just don't like talking about your feelings.
However, if you want to change something, you have to free yourself from your emotional coldness. This starts by dealing with your problems. Surround yourself with empathetic people with whom you can Trust have: You can talk to them about your problems.
Psychotherapy may be necessary if the emotional coldness is very pronounced. It also helps with psychosomatic complaints.
Changes in your emotional state can have a positive effect on your quality of life. You won't immediately panic just because someone asks you how you are feeling. You gradually get to know your feelings and can express them in a differentiated way. In the best case scenario, you'll find really good Friends and no longer find emotional outbursts embarrassing or inappropriate.
Developing your emotionality increases your well-being and makes you more self-confident. The good news is that empathy and compassion can be trained. This also includes self-compassion.
The following five tips in particular will help you move forward:
There are also a few practical tips for strengthening your ability to express yourself emotionally. More empathy and emotionality counteract the emotional coldness and make your everyday life easier. This can be achieved through open, targeted communication. For serious problems, therapeutic help may be an option.
You incorporate mindfulness and meditation techniques directly into your everyday life:
How do you perceive your own emotional coldness (or that of another person)? Does it seem to you to be the end of all emotions or do you perhaps even feel comfortable with it because no one can hurt you?
The individual perception of emotions is often based on repressed causes. But with Self-reflection and mindfulness, you will get closer to your feelings. This in turn opens up new ways to Change. This will help you build a stronger connection to your emotional life and get on better with other people. Because when you are less numb, your empathy automatically increases.
You want to learn more about it? Then sign up for the free Meditation Challenge on. Over the next five days, we will take you by the hand to help you understand the topic of Meditation not only to bring you closer to yourself. We will give you a meditation for each day to help you find your inner center and help your inner child to encounter. Experience how you feel more connected to the earth again, better in the Sleep and sharpen your vision of life. The effect: new drive, new Motivation, new incentive to tackle your goals.
