Yes. No. Yes ... or not? Making decisions, can be quite difficult. Because they require responsibility and bring changes. That's why we think everything through again and again. But decisions should not only be made in your head, but above all in your heart. Or like Denys Scharnweber says, "Pay attention to the signs of your body. Do not listen to what is on the outside, but only to what is on the inside!"
Denys Scharnweber is an expert in mental training as well as a sought-after keynote speaker and coach. He regularly appears on the stages of GEDANKENtanken speaker nights and is involved in the coaching of Greator Business ...in the next few days. Denys Scharnweber teaches you everything you need to know about self-awareness. Fancy a little excursion? Then you've come to the right place!
Establish good relationships
Inner decisions are the best. This is what Denys Scharnweber claims and reveals that your body is a great feedback instrument: "If you really want to change, then you have to notice yourself and your body. Not paying attention to your body is not good at all. Because then you enter into relationships that you never wanted to enter into."
Getting into bad relationships means getting into the wrong things. That can mean, for example, surrounding yourself with people who bring you down. Or regularly consuming food that is harmful to your body. According to Denys Scharnweber, you can only form good relationships by having the right perception of yourself. But how do you recognize your perception and how do you realize your full potential with this knowledge?
Listen to the inner self
"I believe that when we come into the world, we are all pure and good as we are. But sooner or later we learn something on the outside. Something we didn't pay attention to before." Denys Scharnweber describes how the complete system in which infants live is breached for the first time by an input from the outside: "Someone goes into the system. And suddenly a part is taken out by a point. And all of a sudden you're not so into the joy, the fun, the Lightness as one was before." The carelessness is over!
Denys Scharnweber: "Sometimes things happen in life and you don't pay attention to what happens to you in the process." He gives an example, "I was about 16 years old and I wanted to be a personality coach. I wanted to empower people to be more courageous, to be more consistent, and to get into good relationships so they could become more powerful and loving in their lives. My desire was to help people grow personally and combine that with martial arts."
So Denys Scharnweber listened to his inner voice and made his decision. He felt happiness at the thought of supporting other people in their personal development. But then came input from outside: a disco acquaintance asked him what he wanted to do for a living later on. This was the beginning of a conversation that confronted Denys Scharnweber with the outside world and shook his inner decision.
If ..., then ...!
Denys Scharnweber: "Back in the disco I first got in touch with 'If ..., then ...'. The acquaintance said, "If you don't have a high school diploma, then you can't do this job." My mistake was that I didn't check and double check. And all of a sudden I got another contact - with the unconscious of a 'because'."
People love justifications. But sometimes you hear reasons that bring you down. You know what that's like? You're motivated, excited, firmly convinced. And then someone comes along with a 'because'. In Denys Scharnweber's case, the problem was that he didn't want to do A-levels at the time. But his acquaintance said "If you don't have A-levels, then you can't study psychology. And if you didn't study psychology, then you can't do the job because then you're not qualified to work with people." Bam!
Ask the right questions
In such a moment, when you believe what is happening on the outside, your joy turns into a bad feeling. Denys Scharnweber knows: "It is not the content that is decisive in the communication between two people, but the energy. And if someone conveys a content with a certain power, combines that with targeted language and then puts a 'because' on it, they win. If you don't control that then, your dream is over."
So when you receive an input from the outside and you feel that it is not good for you, ask yourself this question: Is what is happening really true? Denys Scharnweber: "The questions in your life determine the quality in your life. Because questions align you. So always ask good questions. Check what's happening. Believe in yourself." If something bad becomes embedded in you after a negative input from outside, you need a new, positive feeling.
Follow His Heart
If you don't get a positive feeling following negative input, the negative input stays in your system. Or as Denys Scharnweber says, "Belief affects your ability and your ability affects your behavior. So what are you focusing on? How are you evaluating what's on the outside? What does that do to you? And then comes a belief called experience."
We remember: check input, value our inner more than the outer and put negative things into perspective with the help of our experiences. Check! Denys Scharnweber puts it even more beautifully: "In such moments, remind yourself of what your heart's desire is. Always listen to your heart! Because your heart knows exactly what the right thing to do is."
Make the result clear
Denys Scharnweber draws further important lessons from this learning: "Make the result clear for tomorrow. Start being grateful. Be grateful for the things you have inside of you. Goals often put pressure on us, but fast forward and imagine your life as one big 3D movie! Allow what you want to allow in your life. Allow yourself to do what you deserve!"
We remember: It is important to keep inner Making decisions and enter into good relationships with other people, but also with ourselves and other aspects, for example our diet. If we are confronted with negative input from the outside, we should question it critically, for example by asking: Is this really true what is happening right now?
Last but not least, it doesn't hurt to make tomorrow's outcome clear today: Have visions, dreams and goals - but without pressure. You'll see that "Yes. No. Yes ..." will soon be a thing of the past. Because making decisions can also be quite simple.