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Self-acceptance - how to walk the path to it with ease

Reading time 7 minutes
Self-acceptance - how to walk the path to it with ease

You are perfect the way you are. You have a great personality. Yes, you are beautiful and strong and your peers appreciate you. You do your job excellently and your colleagues admire your professional competence. - All these are phrases you would never say to yourself? Then it's high time to work on your self-acceptance!

We all hear a little voice inside us from time to time that tells us we couldn't do this, we couldn't do that. We wouldn't be good enough for the job, we wouldn't be lovable for a consistent relationship and we wouldn't be beautiful enough to keep up with the others.

Some hear this voice every day and others can only remember darkly how it sounds because they haven't perceived it for ages. The difference lies in self-acceptance.

What exactly is self-acceptance?

We humans are characterized by the desire to become better and better in everything we do. Our heads are buzzing with ideals that we chase after: a successful job, perfect looks, a large circle of friends, a great partner, well-behaved children, a big house... The list is incredibly long. But when all this doesn't correspond to reality, doubts can arise.

"I seem to be doing so much wrong! I'm just not good enough to achieve all that I want!" Thoughts of this nature then stream through the mind and the harping and questioning of one's life begins. This happens because there is a lack of self-acceptance.

That doesn't mean anything to you? Maybe you're more familiar with the terms "self-love" or "self-esteem." They all mean basically the same thing: You accept yourself for who you are and accept yourself with all your strengths and weaknesses. You value yourself and have confidence in yourself and your skills.

Who is perfect?

Self-acceptance isn't about being perfect at all, and you don't have to sugarcoat everything. For example, let's say you have a tendency to be a little messy. To practice self-acceptance, you don't have to frantically try to find a euphemistic reason for it, like: In chaos, the mind can be free and creative. Just take note of this quality and accept that it belongs to you. Of course you can work on it, but this step has nothing to do with pure self-acceptance.

learning self-acceptance

The engine of change: Why self-acceptance is so important

Self-doubt are something you can completely lose yourself in. But that doesn't move you forward, it just stops you. You're dragging yourself down and taking the wind out of your sails. You're wasting an incredible amount of life energy by constantly thinking about why you're not good enough for something and rejecting yourself more and more. This can even lead to total self-denial.

If you have trapped yourself in this state, you deprive yourself of all possibilities to change things. Only if you accept yourself, you can work on yourself. The realistic perception of the actual state forms the important basis for this. On the basis of this, you can develop a clear plan of how you would like to proceed in order to change your Achieve goal.

How to pull yourself out of your slump

Let's look at an example on the topic together. Let's say you'd like to be more fit. You keep thinking, "I'm always out of breath so fast, I hate my unathleticism!" By constantly telling yourself this, you're only dragging yourself down further. You're robbing yourself of energy and also of the Motivationto change something about it.

But if you accept your condition and make the decision: "I would love to be more athletic and will master big jogging laps through the park without any problems by the end of the year", then you finally have a clear goal in front of you that you can orientate yourself by and that motivates you.

Learning self-acceptance: How can I accept myself?

What sounds quite simple at first, is not always the case in reality. Anyone who is plagued by self-doubt on a daily basis will not simply flip the switch overnight and become a master of self-acceptance. But how do you do it?

Become aware of your strengths

You have no problem saying words of criticism against yourself, but when it comes to saying something positive about yourself, you stutter? Go into yourself and think about what you can do really well. Self-praise is expressly desired at this point! Maybe you are particularly helpful, always have a bright idea in difficult situations, are the person everyone trusts, or maybe even the best in your job?

If you find it difficult to acknowledge your strengths, ask your loved ones. Write down all the points they tell you and make a list that you can look at whenever you doubt yourself again.

Analyze your weaknesses

As you already know, self-acceptance is also about openly admitting your own mistakes. This is the first important step towards improvement, if you are striving for it. So analyze your weaknesses and name them concretely. But don't let this drag you down! Always remember, this analysis is important so that you can finally accept yourself completely.

Be kind to yourself

You now have two lists in your hand: one full of strengths, one with weaknesses. If you compare them, you'll find that your strengths have the upper hand, and that feels good, doesn't it? You are your own biggest critic. It is often the case that many of the things we consider weaknesses are not perceived as such by others at all.

Consider the circumstances

No matter how great the demands you make on yourself, it's not always possible to sprint after them. Certain life circumstances can slow you down, and that's okay. Losses, accidents, illnesses and mental problems are just a few issues that can weigh heavily on you. Then it's hard to achieve great things.

Give yourself the opportunity to focus on yourself first and then move on to great deeds. This is also an important step towards self-acceptance. Allow yourself to shift down a gear when necessary and be gracious with yourself.

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5 simple self-acceptance exercises for everyday life

You can practice self-acceptance every day and become more and more self-confident and satisfied. Don't worry, you don't have to spend much time on this. You can incorporate numerous exercises into your everyday life almost by the way. We've put together five of them for you!

1. positive review

Do you also sometimes lie in bed at night, brooding over things that happened today and just can't fall asleep? Don't worry, it's the same for an incredible number of people. But you can turn these situations into something helpful!

Turn your evening review of the day into something positive and think about what you did particularly well today. What put you in a good mood, what helped your Self-confidence given a little boost? If you fall asleep with positive thoughts, you usually sleep more peacefully and thus more restfully. As a result, you wake up the next morning more rested and your mood lifts. And if you're in a good mood, you'll appear much more self-confident.

2. you are not alone

Everyone has a bad day now and then, not just you. The thoughts or problems that plague you today have already occupied countless other people yesterday. So you are not alone!

Keeping that in mind is incredibly helpful. It helps you not to forget that nobody is perfect. And as we all know, a sorrow shared is a sorrow halved, right?

3. get off the mental merry-go-round

Sometimes it feels like the negative thoughts are circling around you like a merry-go-round and you just don't have a way to get off. But you do have it, so use it! As soon as you feel yourself getting lost in negativity again, shout out loud in your mind, "Stop!" Break the stream of thoughts and reflect on your self-worth.

4. listen to yourself

Situations come up again and again that demand a lot from you and perhaps even overwhelm you. This is quite normal, it happens to everyone from time to time. In such moments it is important that you take a moment to listen to your inner self.

How are you doing right now? What do you need? What needs to happen now to make you feel better? Accept the situation as it is, but also accept that you nevertheless have emotional needs, and you are allowed to pursue them as soon as possible.

5. the best friend in you

As the saying goes, you are always your own worst enemy. When it comes to self-acceptance, that's actually true. Imagine your best friend had a hard day and suddenly doubts himself/herself.

Surely you would do everything to build him/her up again, wouldn't you? This is exactly how you should behave towards yourself. Consider yourself your best friend and treat yourself with understanding and kind words.

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Extra tip: What do I do when I just can't accept myself?

Hand on heart: Living self-acceptance is not that easy. There may also be points that you simply can't and don't want to accept, and that's perfectly okay! This is also an important step. But try step by step to give yourself more attention and self-love.

The fact that you won't tolerate certain things is, after all, also something you have to accept. And it is precisely these situations that move us all forward. It's important that you don't get too caught up in shortcomings and drive yourself to the point of self-hatred. Rather, accept them as motivation to improve.

How to strengthen your self-acceptance

If you want to make it far in life and live your dreams, you need a lot of fighting spirit and motivation. The first step you should take on this path is to become more self-accepting and self-confident. In our Self Awareness Webinar you will learn how these topics influence your entire life and how you can use your mentality to look to a successful future.

Positive feelings bring you forward - not only in your private life, but also at work. In this way, you can strengthen your self-esteem on your own initiative and with professional support. With the right tips, you will find your way to more self-acceptance.

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Reviewed by Dr. med. Stefan Frädrich

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