It annoys you with others - but you don't notice it with yourself. Instead of listening properly, you want to rush ahead and talk about your own idea or opinion. But active listening is beneficial for both sides. It avoids misunderstandings and helps you and your conversation partner move forward. Active listening is explained simply here - as are the goals and techniques.
What is active listening?
Clearly: You can only understand the other person if you listen properly. But what is special about active listening?
Active listening means giving your conversation partner full attention verbally and non-verbally. It's not just about hearing the words, but also understanding the feelings and intentions behind them. By asking questions, summarizing and using non-verbal signals, you show genuine interest and build trust.
For the Communication active listening is an essential building block. You notice this when you are talking yourself and feel that no one is really paying attention to you. However, if you actively listen, you show that you are paying attention - by nodding in agreement, perhaps shaking your head, asking an interposed question and other signals.
According to Carl Ransom RogersAmerican psychologist and psychotherapist, active listening is made up of three elements:
If you master active listening, you don't just sit back passively and let the others talk. This only increases the risk of you switching off. Instead, you remain attentive - and you show this with your facial expressions, gestures and verbal feedback.
Anyone who has the floor at the moment wants listeners who won't interrupt them - and still remain attentive. They should please listen properly, but how does that work? In a dialog with another person, it is noticeable when someone is not listening. In a larger group, it's harder to get a word in edgewise, but you can sit back comfortably. But is that a good thing? A look at the different types of listening will help you analyze your own communication.
Those who only pretend to listen nod and like to say "I understand" - but have switched off inside. The brief agreement is just a phrase. Some people only use it to introduce their own speech. Then it's the others' turn to listen.
Pseudo-listening has nothing to do with understanding and is disrespectful. Those who behave this way often do not allow opposing opinions to stand. They are not ready for any argumentation, and when someone else says something, they themselves do not listen.
The main problem is that pseudo-listeners often talk past each other. They feign understanding. This quickly leads to misunderstandings and makes successful dialog impossible.
In a longer speech, the other person listens "absorbingly" and remains silent. This may be related to the fact that the listener has no opinion of his own. Nevertheless, he is attentive and indicates this by exchanging glances with the speaker. Signals such as a slightly bent-over posture or nodding head show that the receptive listener is fully engaged.
In paraphrased listening, the listener is asked to reproduce what has been said in his own words. In this way, an individual's speech becomes an active conversation. Paraphrasing is proof that the listener was attentive and understood all the essential points. The reproduction of the content can be followed by questions and an own evaluation. Initially, however, the focus is on understanding the views presented.
This type of listening helps you understand key points of the conversation. In professional life, paraphrased listening promotes the efficient communication, be it in a team meeting or in a face-to-face dialog.
Active listening refers not only to the content of the conversation, but also to the emotions of the interlocutor. Thus, it increases paraphrased listening. In addition to the factual level comes the comprehensive understanding of the speaker. This leads to a correspondingly strong trust.
Active listening enables you to better approach your conversation partner. You can understand the argumentation well and continue the conversation purposefully. The understanding advantage is particularly important. Through open conversation and active listening, you avoid misinterpretations. In addition, you create a good basis of trust if you listen actively and argue intelligently.
The goal of active listening is, above all, to understand your counterpart correctly. This is an important point not only in professional life, but also in private life. Relationships. The pleasant atmosphere strengthens trust and makes it easier to adjust to the interlocutor.
By actively listening, you improve your respectful interaction with other people. You can use your feedback to encourage them to take certain actions and thus initiate solutions to problems. Other goals include correcting your own behavior and thus personal development.
Are you listening well but have the impression that the person you're talking to doesn't notice? Use your body language and verbal means to signal that you are paying attention:
Active listening according to Rogers is based on the listener model. Carl R. Rogers divides active listening in the Communication into four elements or steps.
Rogers sees active listening as an important building block of understanding conversation. He is more concerned with the emotional content than with intellectual absorption. In other words, the heart is listening. One's own interpretations should not interfere with listening - instead, the focus is on the trusting relationship.
For the empathy Rogers initially relies on non-directive conversation. This means that you do not exert any pressure and do not influence your counterpart's attitude. In the best case, you bring your interlocutor to solve his problem himself - just by your active listening. Non-directive means that you participate and empathize - but without manipulating the other person.
Rogers' second "technique" is empathy, the ability to understand other people emotionally. When you are empathic, you experience the inner world of other people as your own world. Accordingly, your understanding and Acceptance. This allows you to give others enough time to put their feelings into words. This positive attitude creates a strong relationship of trust.
How do you imagine your audience? This question helps you to reflect on your own communication behavior. Good listening is a valuable skill that is beneficial both in your private life and at work. Those who master this skill have a better chance of success because the other person feels respected and understood. Would you like to know which other soft skills are important for your personal and professional development? Then take a look at our Soft skills list.
By learning active listening, you will learn your own Habits consciously. You don't get distracted so quickly and stay focused during the conversation. That way, you don't miss any details and can follow up if necessary.
It is important for managers to be responsive to employees. With the help of various exercises and communication techniques, you can improve your listening skills. However, you should not overdo the tips, but rather adapt them to your own personality and the situation. Forcing eye contact may irritate the person you are talking to, and nodding too often can seem unnatural.
Classic techniques for active listening as a leader:
Active listening is important in everyday work and private life. During a coaching session, you can familiarize yourself with the techniques and improve your leadership skills.
The free Career Workbook from Greator shows you suitable methods and exercises that promote your career. With these practical tips, you will be able to motivate your employees and overcome difficult phases. The right, active listening is not only important for your professional advancement: it also strengthens collegiality and trust. In this way, you stay in the flow and counteract the tough daily work routine and burnout.
Source: Wikipedia, Career bible
