Why some people believe they do not deserve love

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Why some people believe they do not deserve love

Deep in our hearts, we humans long for true and unconditional love. At the same time, many people close their inner selves. They lock their hearts with heavy locks and don't give others a chance to find the keys to their hearts. These people find it difficult to accept the love they actually desire so much. Sometimes they don't even register that it's right in front of them. Because love is everywhere if you reach for it.

But why do these people find it difficult to accept strong affection and appreciation? Some of them believe that they are not worthy of being loved. Others have been so hurt in love that they are afraid to open up again and engage wholeheartedly with another person. They have all built up a protective armor or put on a suit of armor to protect against being hurt again. But love requires emotional closeness and that only works if you take off your armor or armor. In this article we would like to show you how it works.

Allow emotional closeness

Fear of emotional closeness is characterized by people needing increasingly more distance as a relationship becomes closer. Perhaps this situation sounds familiar to you: You want nothing more than a happy partnership. Suddenly, Mr. or Mrs. Right shows up on your doorstep. But instead of making a commitment, you hesitate. You're afraid of being hurt or overwhelmed by your feelings. And instead of looking for a solution, you flee. Over and over again. Each time, you find it a little harder to even relate to another person. And at some point you doubt that you can accept love and open your heart.

The good news is that yes, you can. But you have to be willing to work on yourself and remove blocks in your mind. Most fears are related to negative experiences from your past. If you have experienced disappointments, hurts or shocks in previous relationships, you need to work through these in the first step so that you can experience new love in the second step. Sometimes it is advisable to consult a life coach or psychologist.

Don't you deserve love?

Sometimes we build up a protective armor because we do not consider ourselves valuable and lovable. For some people, this feeling is particularly strong. They believe that they don't deserve to be desired by someone else. And even though they are attracted to someone and the feeling is mutual, they can't really let themselves go. The reasons why people have such sad thoughts can be many. It is not uncommon for them to have a false self-image or basically low self-esteem. Sometimes they have also had negative experiences with an ex-partner who kept them down and made them feel unlovable or worthless.

Thoughts like "no one who really gets to know me will want to be with me" are at the forefront of their minds. And although they don't have this feeling on purpose, of course, it always creeps back in at the very moments when they could actually be happy. Self-doubt eventually leads to anxiety. Because when you feel unlovable, but another person shows you that they love you, you wonder if something could be wrong. This increases your fear of being hurt, disappointed, or taken advantage of. It is a downward spiral that you can only break yourself.

You are valuable & lovable

If we don't love ourselves, why should anyone else? Self-rejection works like negative hypnosis: the more negative beliefs you internalize, the stronger your self-doubt becomes. Before you can form a close bond with another person, you must first save the most important relationship of your life: the relationship with yourself.

Realize that you are unique and wonderful - just the way you are right here, right now. You are perfect right this second and no matter what you do, think or feel, you will always be valuable and lovable. A little guide for more mindfulness and acceptance can be found in our magazine article "How to learn to love yourself". In addition, you should avoid dealing with people who tell you the opposite. Whoever says that you are not worthy of receiving love should no longer be among your close circle of friends or acquaintances. Because you are worth it!

Find love and like-minded people

It's especially inspiring to share with people who are on the same spiritual level as you are - people who want to grow personally and bring out their best selves. Because community and cohesion are incredibly motivating and make your life much more colorful. Therefore we have LIFElove a platform for singles who love life!

LIFElove was created at the request of our wonderful community. It is a digital place to meet people who are looking for a partner to share the most beautiful moments with them. Growing together is fulfilling in a very special way and is doubly enriching. Do you want to go on this journey together with a partner? Then join us, come to LIFElove and get to know new people online, with whom you can unforgettable moments. We are looking forward to you!

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