Why some people believe they do not deserve love

Reading time 4 minutes
Why some people believe they do not deserve love

Deep in our hearts, we humans long for true and unconditional love. At the same time, many people close their inner selves. They lock their hearts with heavy locks and don't give others a chance to find the keys to their hearts. These people find it difficult to accept the love they actually desire so much. Sometimes they don't even register that it's right in front of them. Because love is everywhere if you reach for it.

But why do these people find it difficult to accept strong affection and appreciation? Some of them believe that they are not worthy of being loved. Others have been so hurt in love that they are afraid to open up again and engage wholeheartedly with another person. They have all built up a protective armor or put on armor to protect against being hurt again. But love requires emotional closeness and that only works when you take off your armor or armor. In this article, we want to show you how.

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Allow emotional closeness

Fear of emotional closeness is characterized by people needing increasingly more distance as a relationship becomes closer. Perhaps this situation sounds familiar to you: You want nothing more than a happy partnership. Suddenly, Mr. or Mrs. Right shows up on your doorstep. But instead of making a commitment, you hesitate. You're afraid of being hurt or overwhelmed by your feelings. And instead of looking for a solution, you flee. Over and over again. Each time, you find it a little harder to even relate to another person. And at some point you doubt that you can accept love and open your heart.

The good news is that yes, you can. But you have to be willing to work on yourself and remove blocks in your mind. Most fears are related to negative experiences from your past. If you DisappointmentsIf you have experienced injuries or shocking experiences in previous relationships, you must work through these in the first step in order to be able to experience new love in the second step. To do this, it can sometimes be advisable to involve a life coach or psychologist.

Don't you deserve love?

Sometimes we build up a protective armor because we do not consider ourselves valuable and lovable. For some people, this feeling is particularly strong. They believe that they don't deserve to be desired by someone else. And even though they are attracted to someone and the feeling is mutual, they can't really let themselves go. The reasons why people have such sad thoughts can be many. It is not uncommon for them to have a false self-image or basically low self-esteem. Sometimes they have also had negative experiences with an ex-partner who kept them down and made them feel unlovable or worthless.

Thoughts like "No one who really gets to know me will want to be with me" are at the forefront of their minds. And although they don't have this feeling on purpose, of course, it always creeps back in at the very moments when they could actually be happy. The Self-doubt eventually lead to anxiety. Because when you feel unlovable, but another person shows you that they love you, you wonder if something might be wrong. This increases your fear of being hurt, disappointed, or taken advantage of. This is a downward spiral that you can only break yourself.

You are valuable & lovable

If we don't love ourselves, why should anyone else? Self-rejection works like negative hypnosis: the more negative Beliefs the stronger your self-doubt will become. Before you can form a close bond with another human being, you must first of all understand the most important Saving the relationship of your life: the relationship with yourself.

Realize that you are unique and wonderful - just the way you are right here, right now. You are perfect right this second and no matter what you do, think or feel, you will always be valuable and lovable. A little guide for more mindfulness and acceptance can be found in our magazine article "How to learn to love yourself". In addition, you should avoid dealing with people who tell you the opposite. Whoever says that you are not worthy of receiving love should no longer be among your close circle of friends or acquaintances. Because you are worth it!

Become more confident through coaching

Are you really living each day the way you want from the bottom of your heart? Or do invisible forces seem to keep you from making your goals a reality? And do you perhaps frequently encounter difficulties with your fellow human beings who always show the same patterns?

In our new webinar. "More Confident Through Coaching" our coaching experts Christina & Walter Hommelsheim explain to you how you can gain more self-confidence through their unique coaching method and thereby attract positive changes into your life. In this webinar you will also learn:

  • why your Self-confidence affects so many areas of your life
  • which beliefs shrink your self-confidence & keep you small
  • how to change your future with the power of your thoughts
  • how to learn to stop letting your subconscious control your reality
  • which coaching method you use to gain more self-confidence

You want your Life finally self-determined and courageously live and make your vision come true? Then sign up now for our free webinar and learn from the best in the coaching industry how to boost your self-esteem in just 1.5 hours.


So you finally become really self-confident

In just one and a half hours, learn how to improve your self-esteem through a simple coaching method.
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Reviewed by Dr. med. Stefan Frädrich

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