We often listen to others' opinions instead of our own! But why? With this question has also Tobias Beck busy. The coach calls it the "MIDMAWAM Syndrome": I care more about other people's opinions than mine. And the Speaker knows what he's talking about, as he said at the LIFEfest in Munich in June told. Above all, what made him want to become a speaker: "I went to many schools, everywhere I flew down.
When my sister was eight years old, I overheard a conversation between my parents. They urgently needed a daycare place for Johanna so that Mom could go back to work." One day Tobias Beck came home from school and his mother was beaming because finally his parents had found childcare. "Because I wasn't doing so well at school, my mother also registered me there in the Homework supervision on. And at some point we were there on Thursdays, Fridays, Saturdays, Sundays. After half a year it was clear to me that we had ended up in a cult. I wasn't allowed to make friends and had to go proselytizing instead."
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"If I was not compliant, I was punished"
Tobias Beck could recount countless examples from his childhood in which his opinion was not sought. Even worse, he recalls: "Once I snatched Bravo out of the hand of a boy from the parallel class, I crumpled it up and told him why he wasn't allowed to read it. The result: I ended up in the men's room piss trough and people were stepping on me. Then when I came back to the church, I had to sit in the 'hot seat' and justify why I couldn't get new members." If he was not compliant, Tobias was handcuffed to the garden fence. Before him, people were married who did not know each other. Before him, people had exorcisms performed on them. "It was a horrible time," the father of two looks back on his childhood.
"I can't have friends outside the community".
Then a girl from school came up to him and said, "Tobi, you're kind of weird." I looked at her and said, "I'm not allowed to talk to you. I'm not allowed to have friends outside the community." The classmate echoed that Tobias Beck didn't want to tell her what they were doing there. "I started crying. As a result, she went to the school's social pedagogue and, with the help of the police, the cult was broken up. But the most intense moment for me was when there were always cars outside our front door, flashing their lights to remind us that we were still part of the community."
"Don't go back to the drama, help others".
Tobias Beck made a decision then: "I will stand for it if anything in my life is enough for me!" He suggests, "Let's do it like the Japanese!" A Japanese tea ceremony master showed him how Japanese culture works during a stay abroad. "We Germans throw everything away. There, everything is repaired and reused. If something is broken, the Japanese make it even nicer and patch it up.
And that's what any of us can do with our past!" the bestselling author encourages. "If you really fall flat on your face in life, get up and move on. Don't keep going back to drama, to victimhood, but help others." 16-year-old Greta Thunberg is holding up a mirror to us right now - according to Tobias Beck. He thinks we can't be quiet anymore and urges you to stand up when you don't like something. Above all, he encourages women: "Dear girls, it's your turn. The time for being quiet is over! Take responsibility. The stage needs a lot more female support."
Meditation as a school subject?
The foundation for forming opinions begins very early in childhood. Did you learn to dream big at school? What do you know about entrepreneurship? Did you learn to meditate, to pass on gratitude? Did you learn to work with Mobbing or protectively stand in front of others who can't? "No, these school subjects do not exist. That's why I can't accept our education system anymore. That is the reason why Masterclass of Personality for 12- to 15-year-olds is: "Throw away your pacifier and your life jacket and get into action!" Motivational expert Tobias Beck recommends his "BLAPS" method:
B: Enthusiasm for your life - do you still have that?
L: Lovely. Can you still open your heart? Like Joe Dispenza says: Let the signature of your life be love!
A: Can you get into action? This planet needs you here. This is where life begins, where you are.
PPositive attitude! See the world as it is, but not worse than it is.
S: Fun! Do all things with fun and love!