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Cheating - how to master the crisis of trust in your relationship

Reading time 7 minutes
Cheating - how to master the crisis of trust in your relationship

For most couples, fidelity is the most important characteristic of a relationship. Infidelities lead to a loss of trust and often to the end of the partnership. Cheating is the number one possible reason for breaking up, but an affair does not automatically have to be a Separation mean. In discussions with the partner, wishes and expectations for the partnership can be expressed and Misunderstandings be clarified.

Cheating is always a test of love. Why do people who are in a committed Relationship are, an affair? For one Side jump there are many reasons. Lack of attention from the partner, different ideas about sexuality or boredom are causes that are often given for cheating.

In addition, the desire to break out of the daily routine and reshape life can lead to infidelity. It is not easy to repair the relationship after you have caught your partner cheating. If you meet the other person with understanding and tolerance, forgiveness and reconciliation are possible.

What is cheating?

The term cheating is usually used synonymously with fling or affair. But what is cheating really? How often infidelity occurs is not known. It is assumed that numerous men and women dream of erotic activities with others, even if they are in a committed relationship.

In the case of infidelity, a distinction is made between emotional, physical or e-flirting. An affair with a sexual background is called physical cheating. Emotional infidelity is when feelings are involved, but physical togetherness is avoided.

The most modern variant is so-called e-intercourse. One of the achievements of our digital world is that human contact can also take place online. Anyone who is on dating sites and portals dedicated to the topic of sex can cheat on their own partner by e-foreigning.

Flirting = abuse of trust?

Cheating as a description for infidelity has only been in use for about a decade. The term is defined as physical and/or emotional cheating outside of a committed relationship. Typical for an affair is the concealment of the same by deliberately lying to the cheated partner.

What exactly is understood as cheating is subjective and depends on one's own interpretation. For many women and men, infidelity only begins with sexual activities outside the existing love relationship. For some people, even flirting is an abuse of trust, while others consider intimate kissing of their relationship partner with another person as cheating.

cheating forgive

Where does cheating begin?

There is no clear definition of what is considered cheating and what is not. The decisive criterion is personal values. Does an affair start with flirting? Is making out a reason for breaking up? You decide whether you feel this is cheating.

It is normal to find other people attractive, even if you are in a committed partnership. This does not constitute infidelity. Only clear actions, such as flirting or dating, can be interpreted as cheating.

Dream interpretation cheating

Depending on personal values, even the thought of a sexual adventure with another woman or man is a fling. An example of this is the dream interpretation cheating. Dreams of sex with others have little to do with reality. Nevertheless, fantasies can be indications that the relationship is perceived as sexually frustrating. However, it is not a matter of actual cheating, because the infidelity takes place only in dreams.

Contacts with ex-partners are also considered an indication of possible cheating. Clingy partners already interpret the registration at a dating portal or the visit to a strip show as the beginning of an affair. Particularly in the case of deep mistrust or Jealousy the expectations regarding the partner's fidelity and reliability are very high.

A special form of infidelity is the cheating personality disorder. Thus, narcissists are said to have frequent infidelities. Narcissistic personality disorder is characterized by an extreme Need for recognition and attention, but this disorder is not so common.

Decisive for the definition of where cheating begins are one's own demands and individual ideas of what constitutes a good Relationship constitutes.

Why do you get involved in an affair?

A harmonious relationship thrives on love, trust and fidelity. Why do women and men still get involved in an affair? Isn't it unusual to cheat on someone you love?

Cheating is a sign that something is wrong in the partnership. After the rosy phase of infatuation is over, the first weaknesses of the partner are discovered. The Dissatisfaction grows, especially when there is hardly any opportunity to spend time together in the hectic daily routine.

Lack of closeness in the relationship increases the desire to cheat and to get the attention and tenderness missed at home somewhere else. Jealousy of the partner and the associated control addiction are another reason to cheat.

Boredom and an unsatisfying love life encourage the longing for variety and the erotic kick. Taking advantage of favorable opportunities to flirt is probably the most banal excuse for a fling.

What are the types of affairs?

There is no such thing as a typical affair. When it comes to flings, a distinction is made between different forms. These are:

  • One-night stand
  • Casual affair
  • Sexual affair
  • Emotional affair
  • Romantic affair

An One-night stand is a temporary affair. Short-term cheating is also described as a one-time misstep. A chance encounter at the company Christmas party, during a business trip or on vacation can lead to a one-night stand. In this form of fling, the focus is on sexual attraction. It is about having fun, acting out erotic fantasies and spending quality time together. A joint future is not planned.

Just like the one-night stand, the casual affair from the non-committal nature. People meet by chance, for example while waiting at the bus stop, at the airport or in their favorite café, talk to each other and become closer. The same sense of humor, similar interests and a liking for each other lead to an informal affair. Long-term relationships rarely develop.

Classic cheating is considered to be the sexual affair. Flirting with an attractive colleague in the office, enjoying a fling with the fitness trainer and having fun with the secretary during a business trip is the standard variant of flinging.

The emotional affair is rather complicated. This connection often arises from what is actually a platonic friendship. If there is a crisis at home, deep feelings for a girlfriend or boyfriend can suddenly arise. You feel emotionally connected to each other and can talk about anything. Sexuality is in the background.

An romantic affair to have, many people wish. This fling includes erotic activities as well as joint ventures. The goal is to spend as much time as possible with the other person. This type of affair often occurs when the actual relationship is at risk and a breakup is only a matter of time.

dream interpretation cheating

Can cheating be prevented?

Cheating has been reported since ancient times. Are there ways and possibilities to prevent an affair? Couples who talk to each other and give each other enough space have the best chances. Overprotectiveness and control addiction are risk factors that encourage cheating. Do not restrict your partner if you want to prevent an affair.

At the beginning of a love relationship, both show themselves from their most beautiful side. The styling is carefully selected, body and beauty care are important. Over time, routine creeps into the relationship. You hardly attach any importance to appearances anymore, you sit at the breakfast table in your pajamas and with unkempt hair. To protect yourself from cheating, you should pay attention to a well-groomed appearance and not let yourself go.

Heed warning signals

Notice the warning signs that might indicate an affair. Does your partner whisper on the phone or hang up when you join them, do you suddenly have to work more and more overtime? If business trips are necessary, even over the weekend, alarm bells should be ringing.

No more time for joint activities or no interest in sex can be an indication of an infidelity. Stay in touch with your partner, support him or her if there are problems. Avoid making derogatory comments about your partner's behavior. Unjustified criticism and verbal attacks have driven many men (and women) into the arms of a lover.

Want to prevent cheating, then:

  • Schedule regular time for two
  • Be sure to communicate in a friendly, approachable manner
  • Listen attentively
  • Avoid inappropriate accusations and criticism
  • Learn to deal with conflicts in the partnership

Should you confess cheating?

Confessing cheating is not an easy decision. Depending on how deeply you hurt your partner's feelings with your affair, a breach of trust and separation can be the consequences.

When an infidelity is confessed, the person who has been betrayed goes through a roller coaster of emotions. Love and longing, anger and sadness, but also fear of the future make it difficult to decide how to proceed. Does the relationship still have a chance? Can cheating be forgiven?

An affair is a test for the partnership. Before you confess your cheating, you should think about what you are doing to your partner. Take time to sort out your feelings and thoughts. Only when you know what you want, you should involve your partner.

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The 10 most common reasons for cheating

Reasons for cheating can be very diverse. We have summarized the ten most important triggers for infidelity here:

  1. Missing Appreciation or lack of attention
  2. Escape from everyday worries and relationship problems
  3. Low Self-esteem
  4. Monotony and boredom
  5. Unfulfilled sexual desires
  6. Too little closeness and love
  7. Control addiction and clinging of the partner
  8. Frequent spatial separations (for example, long-distance relationship)
  9. Jealousy
  10. The desire to reshape life

A lack of appreciation and attention often leads to looking elsewhere for love and understanding. With relationship problems and everyday stress, many people take refuge in an affair. Women and men with low self-esteem, who do not feel respected by their partner, want to polish up their self-confidence by cheating.

To overcome monotony and boredom, people get involved in a casual affair. Control addiction and clinging are among the risk factors that promote cheating, as is jealousy. Sometimes a fling is associated with the desire to give life a different direction and start all over again with a new partner.

Can a relationship work despite cheating?

The cheating of a partner plunges the relationship into a crisis. In order for the partnership to still have a chance, it is important to understand the motives that led to the affair. In joint discussions, what happened can be processed and amicable solutions can be found.

In order for the relationship to heal, a debate is necessary. In daily life, there will always be temptations. Love, respect and care for the other person, combined with affectionate communication, are the "best precautions" against cheating.

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